These beauties above can be found at Walton’s Fancy & Staple on West Sixth. For those Us Weekly readers out there, Walton’s is best known for its owner, Sandra Bullock, who also owns Bess Bistro across the street, but Walton’s is worth a visit for more than just a potential celeb sighting. The tagline “Perishable, cherishable, fetishable” certainly doesn’t lie. Everything about the place is adorable, from the branding and the menu to the beautiful historic building its housed in to the names of the dishes.

No matter what your sweet tooth demands, you’ll find something to satisfy it. For carb-lovers, I’d recommend the Golden Egg, a nutmeg cake rolled in cinnamon and sugar that despite being the size of your palm, feels like it weighs as much as a bar of gold. It’s pure rich goodness. Chocoholics should try the flourless chocolate hearts, which are also unbelievably dense and unbelievably rich. The next best thing to comfort food is the Lone Star Whoopie Pie, a cream cheese filling sandwiched between two sweet potato cakes. YUM. And the cookies are huge and mouthwatering. The iced lemon sugar cookie I tried was soft and chewy and the perfect palate-cleanser to my awesome turkey sandwich, The Gobble.

On the weekday I stopped in, the line for lunch was out the door, and I heard soon they’ll also be serving wine and beer in the evenings. Or you could pick up a pastry and gourmet espresso drink during their reverse morning happy hour. If you stop by, fall in love with the food and also happen to hear wedding bells in your future, keep Walton’s in mind. This one-stop shop also offers custom cakes, catering and floral design. Sweet.

Many people took to the stage for several of the more energetic pop princess songs like Beyonce’s “Single Ladies,” where we were asked to display the flashing gummy rings they provided us while waiting in line. They also threw out glow sticks in hoards during “Toxic” and again during Miley Cyrus’ “Party in the USA” and confetti rained down during Kelly Clarkson’s “Since U Been Gone.”

There were many favorites from the ’80s and ’10s ranging from The Pointer Sisters’ “I’m So Excited” and “Love is a Battlefield” (in which, yes, Pat Benatar and company shimmy at a man to frighten him) to “Womanizer” and Taylor Swift’s “You Belong with Me.”

There were also, of course, Lady Gaga videos, which I admit I’ve only heard about in legend until last night (though I already loved her music), and they’re amazing. Just those videos alone make this experience worth checking out.

Never been to a sing-along? Basically, you’re surrounded by a sold-out theater of people who want to sing and dance along with their favorite videos, loudly, so any possible shyness evaporates during the first line of the first song played. People also tend to dress up (I might’ve sported a hot pink wig) and dance dance dance. And just in case you don’t know the words to a song, they run them on screen, so you’ll be able to sing your heart out to every lyric.

Word to the wise: Buy tickets while they last. Sing-alongs tend to sell out very quickly.

Today, after some not so subtle hints on Cynthia’s part, I’ve picked up the ingredients for caprese salad – an Italian classic that’s easy to put together, hard to ruin, and almost inevitably a crowd pleaser. The trick to the caprese salad, as is the case with all Italian cooking, is getting the freshest, most high quality ingredients. The most crucial of these is the tomatoes. They should be vine ripened, tangy, sweet, and dense. Homegrown cherry tomatoes are best.  Tomatoes from your local farmers market, likely picked that day, are a close second, especially if the stall owner will let you taste test one. If you do not have these, I recommend buying the very most expensive cherry tomatoes in the best commercial produce section that you can find. Or, if you do not like your guests that much, buy whatever tomatoes you want – however, the better the tomatoes, the better the salad, so maybe consider a sliding scale of how broke you are vs. how much you like your guests. Sometimes a compromise of generic grape tomatoes is fair.  Lastly, do not store your tomatoes in the fridge. It will leach all the flavor out of them in a matter of hours.

Second, the mozzarella cheese. The best caprese I’ve ever eaten was at essentially a train station café in the southern portion of Italy, near Naples (or Napoli, if you want to be fancy about it). In that area, they use a special process and a special kind of milk to produce a kind of mozzarella cheese I’ve never tasted the equal of, which ends up all runny and milky and coats the tomato in mozzarella wonderfullness. This cheese is also the reason that pizza in Naples is hands down the best pizza I’ve ever tasted.  However, we can’t get that cheese in Austin. You might be able to get it in New York, but I wouldn’t know where. What you can get, though, is fresh mozzarella packed in water in small round plastic containers. Buy the smaller balls of cheese, which should be about the size of a ping pong ball or smaller. The perlini, if available, are even smaller and look really good on a plate or toothpick. Again, you can substitute a cheaper version of the mozzarella for the fresh mozzarella if you like – I would recommend Sargento brand mozzarella if you’re going to do this, as it is better than average and available in almost every grocery store.

Presentation may vary. Sometimes if I’m feeling extra fancy I skewer two quarters of a mozzarella with two cherry tomato halves, but this takes a while. You can just quarter everything and toss it on a colorful plate. Cut everything up into small enough pieces that a single bite will include one or two pieces of tomato and mozzarella.

Dressing the salad requires drizzling it with olive oil and balsamic vinegar, and topping it with fresh (fresh! I mean it!) chopped basil leaves. The olive oil and vinegar, again, should be relatively high quality. I find that the Whole Foods 365 store brand olive oil to be a pretty good deal for the money. Also, make sure that whatever balsamic vinegar you buy, it reads “di Modena” on the label. It’s best if you make this dish just before you serve it, so that the tomatoes don’t have to hang out in the fridge while you wait for your guests to get hungry, but definitely save drizzling for just before you serve, as the vinegar will be absorbed into the cheese if it sits too long.

And that’s it! This dish usually gets eaten up as soon as it’s served, so maybe take a few bites yourself before you get out of the kitchen with it.

Seth’s Meatloaf

           3 pounds of ground beef
           2 eggs
           1 can of diced tomatoes
           1 can of tomato sauce
           3 slices of bread

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a large bowl mix ground beef, two eggs, and diced tomatoes. Tear the bread into 1-inch chunks, add to the mix, and hand mush all ingredients together. (Good to wash your hands first). Put mound into a deep cooking pan and cook in the oven for 50 minutes. Remove, pour out half of the grease, pour tomato sauce over it, and return it to the oven to cook for an additional 30 minutes. It’s simple and the only meatloaf I’ve ever liked….

Well she’d make the cut, but I won’t be running away to the circus any time soon. (They wouldn’t take me.) I couldn’t even lift my legs and wrap them around the stick and hang after 4 tries, which is step 1….

Trapeze is harder than it looks, but it’s still hella fun, even if you sadly discover, like me, that you’ve lost your ab muscles somewhere along the 40-hour-a-week-office-job trail. Though I was disappointed in my own non-ability, I was not disappointed in this class offered by Trapeze Austin. Even at full price it would be a bargain. You get 2 hours of training, and you’re up on the platform performing your first leg tuck and hang (unless you’re me) within the first 20 minutes. You do this while being strung from safety lines and over a very sturdy net, of course. The most dangerous part is the climb up the narrow ladder and holding on with white knuckles as you try to chalk your hands. The rest isn’t so bad after that first “hep” and drop. Here is a video of my prodigy friend performing a catch on her very first try.

I wish I’d had the foresight to take a photo of the Black Out before we devoured it, but honestly, as soon as my name was called, and we set it down in front of us, it was like some primal drive took over and my husband and I couldn’t think of anything but eating the ridiculously unhealthy bit of deliciousness in front of us. But it was the perfect dessert – a deep-fried donut topped with brownie batter, fudge icing and chocolate-covered brownie bits. YUM.

Right across South Lamar from Maudie’s and only a few blocks down from the Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar, Gourdough’s is the perfect place to stop for dessert after a margarita or a movie. Or make it a meal and get the bacon-topped Flying Pig or the fried chicken and honey butter Mother Clucker. All donuts are $4.25, and you can add ice cream for $1. Few things in life are worth spending an extra 20 minutes on the treadmill, but I think an ice cream-topped donut is one of them.

Now I’m not one of those people who believe humans have evolved to point of needing to be completely hairless. I can’t help looking askance at my personal trainer, who regularly shaves his arms and, I suspect, his legs. He is not a competitive Olympic swimmer either, and in my book, that’s the only valid reason for that. I prefer a guy a little rougher around the edges, with a little hair on his chest, if you know what I mean. Working in a yoga studio, I have also experienced the other extreme, where all body hair is embraced a bit too far. Where is the happy medium?

Having attempted to eradicate the problem of those errant hairs previously, I endured the excruciating pain of electrolysis (think electrified acupuncture needles) with expensive but disappointing results. I also had a very unsatisfying experience at American Laser Center in Austin in the past. So I was a little reluctant about my “surprise” laser hair removal appointment, however well-intentioned. Fortunately for me, lasers and pulsed lights have the most success on people with dark hair and light skin. Lasers use pulsed light to seek and destroy the melanin, or dark pigment in hair, so it naturally works best on brunettes.

The ladies at Smooth Solutions whisked me in this “free” consultation, where to my surprise, rather than a treatment I had to negotiate a set price to pay for each session and sign a wordy contract essentially promising to stay out of the sun entirely (impossible) and affirming that I understood results of any kind were not guaranteed (great) and that the number of treatments needed could range infinitely depending on the person, in part due to the “70-30 Rule” (oh no).

I dutifully returned for my actual appointment a month later. The hardest part was not plucking, waxing or bleaching the treatment area for 30 days because this takes the hair shaft out of the follicle, making it impossible for the laser to locate. With a black Sharpie, a bored assistant prepped me by circling the problem area and shaving my upper lip to avoid the laser literally singeing the fine hairs off and burning my skin. I was left in a small waiting area for the laser technician to come take me into the treatment room.

This much friendlier technician dabbed my upper lip with an ice-cold numbing agent as I reclined in a dentist chair and she geared up an enormous defibrillator-like device. I had to don protective eye gear, that while I knew was for my own good, felt a bit like being blindfolded before being tortured. The technician pressed the little zapper piece to my face, and each time she clicked a button there would be a brilliant flash of red appearing behind my eyelids and a severe shock that I felt to my toes. Thankfully, it was a small area and was over quickly, leaving only the uncomfortable feeling of a severe sunburn. Happily, I can report that I can see a marked difference since that initial treatment. I intend to subject myself to it all over again in another session, where I may attempt to brave baring a few other sensitive areas to the laser, because it certainly beats shaving.

What do you think? Would you permanently rid yourself of all body hair if money was no object? Or as Chickster blogger Shelby wondered in a previous post, is waxing the way to go?

Krause Springs was the perfect introduction to Austin’s swimming holes. Set in an absolutely idyllic bit of Spicewood, Krause Springs is more than worth the 30-mile drive out Hwy. 71. For $5, you get your run of the springs, and for $5 more, you can camp out overnight. Best of all, you can drink. Yay! All beverages not in glass containers are welcome. A picnic lunch, some beer, 72-degree water and a little bit of sun make for the perfect summer day. And I mean a little bit of sun. As a super pale chick, I really appreciated the ample shade the trees provided, both in the water and out of it.

When we first arrived at the springs, we paid our entry fee, walked onto the grounds and saw a decent-sized rectangular pool that looked pretty much like every neighborhood pool ever, except in pretty surroundings and with crystal clear water. I was kind of bummed that it was what we’d driven all that way for, but then we saw signs directing us to the real springs, which are below. A winding swath of water surrounded by cliffs and trees, the springs were exactly what I’d always imagined. They even had a rope swing. (See if you can spot the guy in the photo below who looks like he belongs in the wolf pack.)

If you’ve never been to Krause Springs before, I definitely recommend bringing along some water shoes. They may be dorky and bring back bad memories of childhood trips to the beach, but the footing (at least in the spots where I could touch) is very slippery, so you’ll be glad you have them.

So which swimming hole do you think I should try next?

So I was forced by gunpoint to see the third installment of the “Twilight Saga”, aka “Eclipse,” at the awesome South Lamar Alamo Drafthouse last night. But even the awesome power of the Drafthouse couldn’t save my soul from this piece of cinematic garbage. (I promise I’m not going into this review biased or anything. I have seen the other two “Twilight” movies and actually kind of enjoyed the first one.)  

First of all, the party to my left AND right both ordered chocolate chip cookies. I wanted chocolate chip cookies sooooooooo bad but resisted. Smelling the other people around me munching away on those glorious chewy moist amazing cookies really wasn’t easy… so I devoted even more more focus than usual to the movie itself. And it sucked. Hard. Yes, there was a kinda cool battle scene at the end with heads being ripped off, but just because the Allies won WW2 doesn’t mean the Holocaust was worth suffering though… but I won’t bash the movie, that’s not my style. Instead I’ll offer up a few philosophical questions to think about as you sit down to waste away 2+ hours of your life. (Cuz you know you’ll see the movie. EVERYONE will see the movie and you can’t be the only one who doesn’t.)  

1.) Why do tween girls worship Bella as a role model? She does absolutely nothing in any of the three movies except whine, cry and bitch. I really hope our future generation of women is smarter than this. Following that question, why do all the guys in this franchise (Edward, Jacob, Mike and Eric) even like her? As a guy, there is nothing to like. Sure, she’s attractive, but that Jessica blows Bella out of the water in the looks and even the smarts department. (Valedictorian??? Really?)

2.) Why don’t the girl werewolves have to take THEIR shirts off like the guy werewolves do?

3.) Does no one in town question how the Cullens can afford such awesome stuff? There is no way Peter Facinelli is banking that much as a small town physician. Their house is awesome. Their cars are awesome. Their matching black leather fighting clothes are awesome. What gives, Charlie? Do some investigating…especially with all the mysterious murders and dissapearances that happen in this freaking town.  

4.) How would Edward have sex with Bella, regardless of if she’s human or a vampire? The author makes a huge point of telling us they don’t have blood or a heartbeat or fluids of any kind, so erections and semen should therefore be impossible. Basically it would be like wanting to marry an impotent sterile man – no risk whatsoever. Hmmmm…

5.) Speaking of which, the most mind boggling aspect of this whole cult is that the story is basically the wet dream of a sexually repressed Morman girl. And the really scary part is that gazillions of little girls all over the world somehow identify with this to the tune of $30 million dollars at midnight screenings alone! Just think, this could become like the new Bond franchise, with new installments coming out every couple of years for the next 20+years. Over time, young girls will think the people and relationships in these movies are actually how life should work.  

So basically, we as a society are f***ed!!!

Seth’s Stir-fry

         1 and 1/2 pound of beef stew meat, super trim
         Worcestershire sauce
         1 red bell pepper
         1 green pepper
         1 yellow bell pepper
         1 yellow squash
         2 red potatoes
         Tony’s seasoning
         garlic salt
         garlic powder

Cut squash into thin “half dollars.” Slice all peppers into strips. Cut potatoes into 1-inch chunks.

Put meat in a bowl and generously sprinkle with Worcestershire sauce and Tony’s and stir. Coat frying pan with butter-spray or a cap filled with vegetable oil. Put meat in pan and cook on medium high heat for about 10 minutes stirring occasionally. Strain the meat with a strainer.

Re-coat pan and put chopped vegetables into the pan adding a little Tony’s, garlic powder, and a tiny bit of garlic salt. Add the meat back to the pan and return to the burner cooking on high (but not boiling) heat. Cook for about 15 minutes, stirring continuously.